The Quiet Guilt of Missing Out

I was sitting at my laptop, scrolling through an events calendar, when I realized I had missed the best ones again. Even though I subscribe, save dates, and try to stay updated, somehow I still miss them. I keep scrolling and see that my city is always alive, something happening every day, every hour. Too much, maybe. I want to attend most of it, but between work, hobbies, family time, friendships, birthdays, big dates, random dates, and the quiet need for time alone, something always slips away.

I want to be more active, to step outside my comfort zone. I press interested, but when the day arrives, I suddenly find an excuse not to go. X, Y, exhaustion, timing. And then comes the anxiety, the familiar fear of missing out.

I love discovering new places and listening to new conversations, meeting people from different professional and creative worlds. Sometimes I do go, but once the event ends, I collect my things and leave immediately. My energy is gone. I showed up, not always out of desire, but out of fear of missing something. And yet, afterwards, I often feel good. Lighter. More alive.

Over the years, I’ve become more introverted. I push myself to attend events because I believe they will boost my creativity, recharge me, and make me feel connected. Sometimes, they do exactly that.

But we live in a digitalized world. Emails, invitations, newsletters, reminders, too many of them. I skip emails, and with them, I skip experiences. I save events in my calendar, but when several things happen at the same time, I lose track. Eventually, I give up trying to keep up.

And still, the fear of missing out has become a condition of our generation. We want to know everything, attend everything, be everywhere, like fishermen trying to catch fish with their bare hands. Possible and impossible at the same time.

So maybe the real question isn’t how to attend more, but how to make peace with missing out.
Maybe we need to accept that we can’t do it all, and stop feeling guilty for the things we don’t choose.